4
The Family
As Sidney walked into the bar she instantly filed the experience in her own head as one of the top ten, least fun moments of her life.
Sidney was no stranger to drinking in bars, pubs and taverns. However, when she did, she preferred them to be clean, or at least not smell like dry urine. The place was a small bar behind a pizza joint in the small town of Streetsboro. It was ill lit and crowded with very unattractive people. Two worn down, dirty pool tables sat to one side. To the other, a dance floor where one women danced alone.
Sid had to stare at the dancing woman for a second. Her belly had a pouch and Sid had to stop and wonder if the woman was with child.
Sidney shook her head and saw Tobias at the bar. He saw her and waved her over. She scowled, storming over. “How did you find this place?”
Tobias frowned at her tone as he ordered her a drink. “It’s not that bad.”
Sidney maintained her frown. “Seriously, did you look up ‘shitholes’ in the yellow pages? It’s like this place is actually trying to be the worst bar ever.”
Tobias shook his head. “Does your arrogance have no limits?”
Sidney took a deep breath then pointed to the dancing girl. “Is that woman pregnant?”
Tobias turned and watched the very drunk thirty-something blonde sway back and forth out of sync with the juke box music. Her hair was matted with sweat, or water or beer. Tobias wasn’t sure which. She wore a tube top and cut off jeans that seemed to be eternally trying to crawl into her vagina. The belly was confusing.
“I’m honestly not sure,” Tobias finally answered.
Sidney nodded. “And that’s my point. I never want to have an ‘is she pregnant’ conversation at a bar.”
Tobias sighed in defeat. “Okay, okay, you made your point, but I didn’t want us to meet at any of our usual joints because I don’t want people to see us together. Just in case, our little scam goes wrong.”
“True, but what I don’t understand,” Sidney began as her drink came, “is why must we meet in a bar?”
Tobias smiled. “You’ll see, so we are early. Why don’t you let me in on the grift?”
Sid smiled. “I do love it when you use old movie jargon like ‘grift’.”
“You should talk. Who says ‘jargon’, anymore?” Tobias punched back.
Sidney began to take Tobias through her plan, step by step. She could see his nervousness as she explained. It was a complicated and slightly convoluted set up, and those kinds of cons had a low success rate. Sidney however, was confident that it was their best course of action given the situation of Bob’s finances.
“That’s pretty… complicated,” Tobias finally said as after Sidney finished. “It’s also got some holes,”
“No plan is perfect, Bias,” Sidney responded. “And as far as holes go, we can just fill in the blanks as we go along.”
Bias drew in a breath in order to respond when he noticed his guest entering the front door. Tobias waved to the man and Sidney turned. The man standing in the doo way was six-one, maybe six-two and large. He was wearing a small shirt which showed off his broad shoulders and big arms. Unfortunately, the shirt also showed off his gut.
The mystery man was not an ‘abs’ sort of guy.
He wore a non-descript, faded t-shirt and jeans. On his head was a camouflage ball cap that said in bright green colors “John Deer”. “That’s your boy?”
Tobias picked up on the sarcasm as he waved over the newcomer. “Give him a chance.”
“His hat is an oxymoron.” Sidney said un-happily.
“You’re an oxymoron.” Tobias fired back juvenilely.
The man also had a small disposable paper Pepsi cup in his left hand and as he approached he spat chewed tobacco into it.
He was carrying a cup of his own tobacco spit.
“Hello,” he said and extended his free hand to Sidney, who stared at it.
“This is Hank Tomec,” Tobias jumped in. “Hank, this is Sidney.”
Sidney finally shook his hand. “Interesting to meet you.”
Hank nodded quietly. “Yeah, same to you.”
The three of them found a back table to continue their conversation. They all sat down. Sidney decided to wait and hear what Hank had to say. She liked to give new people the floor in order to see what they were all about; give them a chance to impress her.
Hank sat there. He sat there, awkwardly.
Sidney slowly looked at Tobias, who avoided her gaze then she turned back to Hank. “So… Hank. Did Tobias tell you what we need.”
Hank nodded. “You need muscle, for a con job.”
Sidney was shocked at Hank’s lack of tact in the sensitive criminal situation. “You know what we are doing is against the law, right?”
Hank thought about it then nodded. “I don’t sweat cops.”
Sidney blinked, unsure whether the man was dense or antisocial or both. “What makes you think you can help us.”
Hank shrugged. “I can fight.”
Sidney stood. “Tobias, can I talk to you?”
Tobias stood and followed her out of ear range from the table. “What the fuck is this?!”
Tobias looked hurt. “It’s the muscle!”
“This guy?” Sidney took a deep breath. “Where did you find him? He seems half retarded and completely devoid of any real speaking ability. Also, he spits in a cup!”
“He’s my future brother in-law.” Tobias said, knowing Sid wasn’t going to like this.
“Really?” Sidney began to flush red. “Well, let’s makes this a family business! Anyone in your brand new family that doesn’t know about me being a criminal?”
“It’s not like that.” Tobias became defensive. “He’s the only one who knows. And let me point out, we need someone with no connection to Leroy Simpson, which is hard to come by, this close to Akron.”
Sidney thought about that for a second. He was right, on that particular point.
Tobias gave her an irritated look. “Look, he doesn’t have to be smart or able to speak for that matter. Just muscle.”
Sidney grinned. “Oh yes, I forgot his one usable skill. ‘I can fight’.” She mocked Hank’s southern Ohio twang voice when she quoted him.
Tobias smiled, then walked to the bar. Sidney watched as he purchased three double shots of Jack Daniels. He then walked back to the table and got Hank to down them one after another in the course of a minute or so.
Alcohol, when chugged or done as a shot, does not take that long to effect the drinker.
Tobias then stood to get another drink and held up his index finger in Sidney’s direction, signaling for her to wait a minute. She mouthed the words ‘what the fuck are you doing?’ but he ignored her.
Instead, he picked up the drink and sat back down at the table. He gave the drink to Tomec, then directed his attention to two big hillbillies playing pool while saying something Sidney couldn’t make out. Tobias then pointed at Sydney and said something. Sidney watched Hank’s face curl into a scowl. His face was flushed from the shots.
He stood and stormed over toward the pool table, while Tobias returned to Sidney’s side.
“What did you tell him?” She asked.
Tobias smiled, “I got Hank drunk, then I told him those guys at the table said you looked like a whore, good enough to rape.”
Sidney looked at him with a raised eyebrow. Tobias turned, smiling. “Hank didn’t seem to like that very much.”
Sidney hated the look on Tobias’s face. The shit-eating grin usually meant he was about to be right.
“RAPE THIS!” Hank suddenly screamed and Sidney turned back toward the pool table as Tomec drove his large meaty hand into one of the pool guys faces.
Hank struck with such force the man’s nose seemed to explode. Blood literally spewed out and down his face. The man’s back arched backward over the table before the dead weight of his lower half dragged him to the floor in a crumpled heap.
The man’s pool buddy came around the table, his pool cue held high like a club. He took a swing but Hank caught the long piece of wood out of the air and ripped it out of his hand before tossing it behind him like garbage. The man looked stunned by the complete destruction of his strategy. Hank took this opportunity and stepped in with a cannon-like uppercut to the man’s centered mid-section. The air was hurled out of the man’s lungs as he keeled over. Hank raised his right hand above his head. He then dropped the fist with a huge downward cross, driving it through the pool guy’s face and sending him to the floor with a broken jaw and possibly some missing teeth.
“God damn pussies!” Hank yelled as he stood upright and pulled his tin of chew out of his back pocket.
The two men wearing staff uniforms were in motion now. They were older, but covered in muscle and tattoos. They probably had some history with the owner, along the lines of prison mates, and that’s how they got the jobs. They looked tough and they weren’t surprised or flat-footed.
The bigger of the two was bald and stood a foot above Hank. He stepped up and pointed a finger at Tomec. “You’re outta here, pal!”
Hank scuffed as he pulled some chew out of his pocket and stuffed it into his mouth, between the lower lip and teeth, “The fuck I am, chief!”
The bald man wound up and took a big swing at Hank. Hank ducked the wild haymaker and came up with a giant left hand uppercut to the man’s inner arm pit. The blow caused shockwaves of pain through his upper body. Hank then came up fluidly grabbing the back of the man’s head and driving it into the pool table with a loud bang. This gave the second bouncer, a slower and fatter man, the chance to land a vicious right cross on Hank’s right cheek.
The blow sent hank staggering and stumbling to one knee. Sidney yelped, “We need to help him-”
Tobias put up a hand and stopped her.
The fatter bouncer advanced on Hank, who reached onto the pool table to grab a ball before pitching it at close range into fatty’s eye. The bouncer yelled and screamed in pain as the ball made a cracking noise upon collision.
The whole bar’s attention now on the fight, collectively said ‘OOOO’
The man’s hands went to his face and he bent over, howling in pain. Hank grabbed the back of his head and lifted his knee, driving it into his face. Fat man dropped.
The bald man, now bleeding from the cut over his eye where his face had struck the table at high velocity, charged, grabbing Hank around the waist from behind and with a roar lifting him off his feet. The man charged Hank into the bar, then grabbed the back of his head pinning him to the bar.
“We have got to help him out of this,” Sidney said, starting to get concerned.
Tobias shook his head still smiling.
Hank drove his elbow backward into the man’s sternum. The blow made the bald man loosen his grip. Hank spun around, whirling into a huge powerful right hook to the injured eye. The bald man staggered from the blow and Hank bent down grabbing him around his waist. With a roar, hank lifted the bald man and back body-dropped him backward over the counter of the bar sending him crashing to the floor behind.
Hank stood there, victorious. Sidney shook her head in disbelief, while Tobias chuckled. Hank turned and spit tobacco over the bar and onto the bald man who lay in a heap behind.
“I leave when I want, mother fucker!” Hank yelled.
He whirled around and realized he had the bar’s attention. “Anyone else want to rape that hotty over there?!” He questioned the bar and they all shook their heads in unison.
Hank then walked to the bar and pulled out a twenty, throwing it at the bar tender. “I want another shot.” The tender dropped a glass on the bar and poured the shot.
Hank took it to the head then slammed the glass back to the counter. “Keep what’s left, it’s not a tip. Buy new bouncers. This place is HORSE SHIT!”
Hank then slid the glass off the counter at the tender.
Tobias looked at Sidney. “So?”
Sidney grinned. “I want one.”
End episode 4
